Rough Thriller Cut

This is what I have produced so far in terms of my edit. There are several different things that need to be changed in this edit. I need to:
-Remove the long shot (shot 2) which is featured at the start
-Place the titles somewhere else. Also make them smaller
-Make some of the fades to blacks shorter
-Cut from 00:11:02 to 00:12:15
-Use some dissolves, instead of fade to black
-Shorten walking shot
-Less scenery shots
-Try different music
Hopefully by changing these few things in my edit, it will look better, create more suspense and flow a lot better.